Alright. What's next?

The first of the two last steps is gone. Gone for what? Time is ticking out for me to be a disorientated and confused bachelor of the Arts. Gone are the days that I thought life is somewhere out there distant in the future. Nine terms gone and the last one with the toil of the writing down a short-scale thesis is ahead. This last term just passed so quickly, I don't know why. The final of the Shakespeare course was just awesome, worth the trouble. I had already dropped the Jazz course. Gülçur's post-colonial literature class inspired ideas for my thesis. I read real cool stuff like Jean Rhys' Wide Sargasso Sea, Jackie Kay's Trumpet, Narayan's A Tiger for Malgudi, and Hari Kunzru's The Impressionist. My eldest sister suggested magical realism as a topic for my thesis. Funny that I'll go along with Lamia Gülçur, because guess I'm mostly interested in what she's interested in terms of literature. She said magical realism is a cool topic, but I need to work on it and decide on the details. By the way, Gülçur is offering a brand new course called "New Writing" in the next semester, and I'm gonna take it unless it conflicts any other compulsory course. What else? The literary criticism final has been draining all my energy for the last two sleepless days. Seems it's gonna ruin my dreams of getting an AA for the course. I don't know if I trusted my midterm grade too much because I did the best that I can. Back from the classics to the neo-classics, such a broad scope in a short time is not supposed to give one a strong idea about criticism, i guess. The Augustan Age had already covered many of what I read in the criticism class. If they cannot reschedule the criticism syllabus, then somebody in charge should take care of the Augustan class. It's just redundant. The copywriting course was dull and boring, maybe it's just that my creativity is down at the bottom, and I need to give much more effort to bring it up to the surface. I took it with Sami. God, he rocks it; he can write jingles, he draws excellent comics, and can come up with new and interesting ideas anytime. Maybe I'm just fine in the strategical part of this advertisement business. We'll see.

I'm not happy. I need somebody else to take decisions for me, about my career, about where I'm gonna stay after this summer, about what i need to do to make myself happy. Human nature is dubious. You see thousands killed in Gaza, stop watching the news, turn to something else that you can handle; because there's nothing else you can do to stop this madness. "Humanitarian steps taken..." You feed yourself, take your meds, watch funny videos at Youtube, take a bath, go have a good time with your friends and think of how you're gonna handle your thesis, your life with all the trivialities within.